Several decades ago, I was a part of a parenting group where emotional needs were frequently discussed.  We learned what emotional needs are, identified them, and learned how to assess if our emotional needs were being met.  Finally, we were taught how to meet those unmet emotional needs.

Learning about emotional needs was valuable for me; I took the lessons to heart, and it changed how I approached my life and how I approached the world. I learned how unmet emotional needs changed a stressful moment, like the dog knocking a plant onto the floor, into a trigger, which caused me to have an angry outburst.

I found great satisfaction in lowering my stress levels by working towards meeting my own emotional needs. This knowledge has been critical in giving me more bandwidth to handle stress and the potential triggers which routinely happen in all our lives.

I learned by assessing and then working on my unmet emotional needs and after meeting my needs, I could withstand stressors and not have an emotional outburst from being triggered. 

Throughout this website, and mostly in my presentations and workshops, I explain:

• What are emotional needs
• How to identify our personal emotional needs
• How to identify if our individual emotional needs are being met
• Why meeting emotional needs is important
• The steps to meet these emotional needs
• How to be proactive to ensure your emotional needs are met, and keep them met, by using “Your Bucket Check”

With research from various psychologists, psychology websites, experts in the field, my decade of experience as a researcher and university professor, and my thirty-plus years of knowledge and experience, I have compiled a list of human emotional needs.

With this list, I explain how to determine which of these emotional needs are most important to us as individuals.  It is my hope to help others understand how to use “Your Bucket Check” and begin to prioritize their emotional needs to become the person they want to be.

How do we continue to give and care about everyone in our lives, and most importantly ourselves, with so many stressors happening daily? Emotional self-care is more than bubble baths, wine, and days off! The emotional self-care process must first include tending to our own emotional needs as this will help us continue finding the energy to care for ourselves and those for whom we are responsible.